Published: 03-10-2025
Updated: 05-10-2025
This is the third appendix. I want to try something different. For a while I have been looking through notes about what I perceived the great choice to be in the ever after, and our road towards that choice. But I never implemented these thoughts entirely into the Scrolls. I considered them to be a bit too fringe – even for this work – and adding them meant I either had to make Chapter 20 even bigger than it is, or make another Scroll. The appendices give me a platform within my own work to still express these thoughts and ideas. I will again assume you’ve read all the Scrolls. This will be a strange appendix. I hope you can appreciate it.
The bible says that we are born in sin, and during our lives we have to pick a side. Choose the side of god and you’ll be granted access to heaven, choose the side of the devil and you’ll be cast into hell. Is there any truth to these claims? If you’ve read the Scrolls you’ll know I think it’s all a swindle. Yes, it is true when it comes to heaven and hell, but it’s truth through omission. In this world we’re constantly confronted with situations that prompt us to ‘pick a side’. If this universe had a motto, that’d be it. ‘Pick a side!’ It marinates us into this way of thinking everything has a side to it, that will either help or harm you. But if you’ve followed along with my stories you’ll understand that I do not think it is that simple. I think in the end there is only one side; you, and you are a complicated being. I believe your spirit is on a quest to learn to love all aspects of itself, and there is an uncountable number of ways to express this love, or the lack thereof.
I think all spirits in this part of our reality are in the twilight. As thoroughly described in Chapter 20; this reality is one based on conditions, and is as such an evil reality. But I think that it’s very near that mirror surface in that trench of good and evil. We’re not in the deep end here. We are still capable of doing good. We inhibit both a good and an evil side. Though this might be an evil reality, you’ve also learned that evil is a self-terminating process, and this I think means the good and bad still balance themselves out in this slice of reality, because evil is constantly destroyed through its own efforts. What parts of the stories of hell and heaven could be true then? I think that only those who have suffered through the torments of any hell can truly appreciate the freedom of heaven. Let that sink in, and realise this means that we as spirits must be both the good and the evil in this world. And as such, I think the road to the great ever after must lead through both heaven and hell.
Yes, we are indeed born in sin. We perceive our reality as a place where we can only exist at the cost of others. The creation of our bodies, from two cells – each from one of your parents – was possible only because our parents consumed other life before them. That consumption forced the spiritual paths of those spirits to change in a direction they would rather have avoided. You could see that as them being sacrificed for you so you could come into existence. Even the reproductive cells that were the basis of you were formed through that process, and so for every cell that came before it. Without context, the tale of a being that can only spawn into existence through the sacrifice of others, sounds like the origin story of some demonic beast. Yet, that seems to be our story. I sometimes ponder and entertain the idea that we split in two at the end of the road, and our ego goes one way as our soul goes the other, but I’m not sure. I think we take a path that lets us experience both. I don’t think we can become God without experiencing existence in its entirety. Maybe our split off switches sides and merges again at the end?
Evil is the opposite of Good. If evil avoids discomfort, God therefore must seek out suffering and even embrace it. I think about the Buddhists that use methods to pain themselves, and how I never understood why anyone would want to meditate all day and subject themselves to pain willingly. Now I get the sanity behind this lifestyle. In a way they’re bringing themselves closer to God by placing themselves in his mindset. We are all young versions of God. We are here to learn how to become him. How does an all powerful deity accomplish this? It figures that he shattered himself into pieces for us to find a way for ourselves to become whole again. And there are many pieces to him. There are so many spirits in this world, all infinite. God is the greatest of all infinities. I think the pieces of him are infinite in number just the same, otherwise it would mean we could put a number on God’s total, and that doesn’t sound possible to me. The greatest infinity must be infinite in all its ways.
So if you choose suffering over comfort, it means that you truly accept the consequence of physical life and you’ll grow spiritually. But if you avoid suffering and seek comfort, then you will inevitably be subjected to a lot of pain, falling down the trench of the good vs. evil dynamic. This reveals to us two very important principles behind our reality. It means that all roads inevitably lead to God, and that we are destined – some where along our spiritual journey – to go through hell. I think we need to, so we can learn from the experience. It makes sense to me. We need to learn how to escape from the grasp of hell in order to truly appreciate the blessings of heaven. It is part of our inner struggle, to become at peace with our dark side and heal it through love, instead of trying to beat it at its own game. That is our challenge in this spiritual journey. So then you may ask yourself; where along that journey am I now? It’s a good question. One I hope to answer in this appendix. But to answer it I need to explain something and refer the Scrolls a few times.
As above, so below. This is one of the core believes of the cult. And we see this principle back everywhere in our reality, not just in the fringe and paranormal. Obviously our economy is a perfect example of it, but I’ve also detailed how our universe functions through a chain of dependencies, all stacked on top of each other. It’s everywhere. Just think about the cells in our bodies. Our avatar for this existence is our body. It consists out of trillions of individual cells. All of them work together so that we – this physical being – can exist. There are many parallels between the way our bodies function and the way our pyramid social structure functions. If a couple of cells die, the body is still fine. You are still you. The same for our society. If some people die, it’s tragic on a small scale, but on the larger scale there is mostly very little impact. Some cells are more important than other cells though, just like some people are more important in our society than others. Most can be missed without any tangible difference to the whole, as long as the majority survives.
There are cells that move supplies, cells that clean up, cells that produce energy, cells that produce substances, cells that steer these and all other processes, cells that patrol and protect; you name it, the body has it. These are examples of the parallels between the functions of our bodies and how our society works. Any one person that dies mostly didn’t want to die, though there are exceptions. Same with our cells. Some cells will sacrifice themselves to tackle a foe, but cells mostly just seem to want to exist. Our body has its army of soldiers, just as our society has. But most cells and most people just want to live as long as possible. And at the top of our society? There is something there, some being, completely dependant on the society to exist this way, unwilling to give up that form of existence and free its subjects. And so the same goes for our bodies. We are that being at the top. We don’t want our cells to abandon their duties and find their own way. Though I don’t think we are evil beings, our existence can only be summarised as evil in this context. Yet, I think we are still capable of doing good.
But we are undeniably controlling lesser beings (our cells) in order to sustain this form of existence, just like the elite and all above them control us. And just like the elite, I sometimes kill my lesser cells for no good reason at all. I might use my nails and pick at a scab out of boredom, hurting myself, causing dozens or perhaps hundreds of cells to lose their lives. Is that any different than the abuse the elites subject us to for their entertainment? I do many things and some of those things fly straight in the face of keeping this body out of harm’s way, just like the elite do with society. But sometimes some of my body’s own cells become a threat to the function of the entire body. Cancer cells are native cells that have gone rogue. Our body is full of processes that preliminarily find and repair if not terminate individual cancer cells. The elite do the same. They are very keen on trying to make sure no rogue humans can collect in numbers and threaten their pyramid. I am a cancer cell in their pyramid. I do not function the way they’d like.
But I’ve kept my influence below the threshold that would trigger them to respond in force. They might monitor me, perhaps. But strangely the elite do all kinds of things that encourage the formation of people like myself; dissidents, that wish to go against the system. And we do the same with our bodies. None of us want cancer, but we constantly subject our bodies to things that can lead to the formation of cancer cells. We sunbath, consume unhealthy foods, drink alcohol, smoke, limit exercise. And when cancer does form, we need to appeal to a higher power outside ourselves to intervene and battle the cancer. Which sometimes they do successfully, but also often times they don’t. The medical industry is notoriously corrupt, but only those who dare to see it actually see it. As discussed in the Scrolls; the money is in the treatment, not the cure. And this is a very insightful revelation when comparing it to the parallels between our bodies and our society. Apparently if our societal dissidence grows too strong for the elite to control, they need to appeal to a power above this system, but if the parallel is accurate, that higher power will only help as long as it benefits them, and treating is more important to them than curing. The cycle must continue.
If doctors will kill cells somewhat indiscriminately to cure cancer, so will the higher power the elites are subjects to kill humans indiscriminately. Perhaps this is what happened 12,000 years ago, during the Younger Dryas. I’m not sure if this is good or bad news for us. An intervention is done to try and preserve the system, but often times when it comes to cancer a patient dies. If not by the cancer, then by something else eventually. We will all die eventually, just like evil. Evil perishes. It’s designed that way. And thus so will our society collapse one day and cease to exist, same with our bodies, and same with our universe. But how did we journey here? Did we come from hell and are we climbing out? Did we come from Heaven to learn? Or were we on our way to Heaven and took a wrong turn somewhere, still able to return with some effort? I don’t know, but I have a gut feeling. Let’s apply the ‘as above so below’ principle to our individual cells, and combine it with something from the Scrolls. In the Scrolls I explained how the corruption of spirits cascades until their empathy is gone and they become part of the natural forces of our universe. Try and keep that in mind.
A single living cell is made out of millions of molecules. Each molecule is made out of atoms. Some molecules consist out of dozens or even hundreds of atoms. Each atom is made out of at least 1 proton, but for our bodies most molecules are made out of many protons, neutrons, and electrons. These are all subatomic particles. The electron is one of many kinds fundamental particles, and the proton and neutron each are made out of a combination of other fundamental particles, making them composite subatomic particles. The protons and neutrons are each composed out of certain quarks, which is the name of the type of fundamental particle that makes them up. Know there are many other kinds of fundamental particles, but I won’t bore you with them as I know too little about them and it doesn’t serve a purpose for this work to explain them. An interesting thing to note about the subatomic realm though is that each particle has an anti-version of itself. There is the antiproton, the antineutron and an anti-electron (called a positron). The antiproton and antineutron are made out of antiquarks.
This is a fascinating thing to take note of in a chapter that once more highlights how this reality is build on dependencies that are kept in repeating loops through duality cycles. These elementary particles are mysterious. Much is done to research them. Billions are being spent to create giant atom smashing machines; huge underground structures built to smash atoms together at near light speed to see what they are made of. And there’s still so much we don’t know and understand about them. But as much as this is a scientific endeavour, I will wager it dabbles in the spiritual just the same. I think this money is being spent because there is an esoteric goal for the cult for this research. The subatomic particles may not be the end of the line into the microcosm. String theory predicts that fundamental particles are made out of one dimensional strings that vibrate, and the frequency of this vibration determines the properties of the quarks, which basically translates to which laws of nature they adhere to. And if you read the Scrolls you know where those laws come from.
But let me refresh your memory, cause this work has become undeniably verbose and bulky. In this work I described the laws of nature as the stagnated soulless wills of once conscious beings that corrupted themselves into disfigurement, until all they could do was limit the spirits in this reality, in order to keep them under control and unable to escape. My thesis is that a free spirit is stronger than these soulless wills, but if that spirit is here, it first needs to learn that it is in fact free and not trapped. This may take a great many lifetimes. Entities exist in this universe on the basis of conditions. Certain conditions need to be met in order for you and me to continue our existence in this form we’re currently experiencing. It’s a pyramid of dependencies. The higher levels are dependent on the lower levels, and they exercise control over the lower levels so that the lower levels form what the higher levels need. This description fits our social and economic pyramid model perfectly. Should we decide to want out, we will either be stopped or be denied the comforts that come from holding this position.
The comforts are certainties. But the system eats itself, and as such will consume all participating spirits at some point in the end. The spirits that serve their system best will not be spared. They’ll just be one of the last to be sacrificed. But this model also applies to the relation between our bodies and our cells. We as beings keep our cells in check, but we need the cells to be where they are and do what they do, otherwise we would perish. We would all perish; the cells themselves too. Being part of this body gives them comforts. Many things are arranged for them, which they otherwise would have to do themselves. They are protected from a lot of the dangers from the outside world. There are more certainties in existing as part of a multicellular life form than would there be through going it alone. Let me ‘as above so below‘ you once more; our cells away from our bodies are weak and die quite fast without the other cells, where by far most single celled life forms are robust and tough. Comforts make us weak on every level.
But let’s look at the cells. They need the molecules to exist. They keep the molecules under control. Without the cells many of the organic molecules in a cell would not be able to exist for long. Organic molecules are notoriously unstable, meaning they tend to break apart or react with other molecules very quickly compared to many other molecules. You see where this is going? All the way down to the suggested strings is each form of things a controling thing that keeps the forms below in place in order to work together in some kind of system. Each system spawns a form with certain properties, that keeps the form below in check in some way. Without the form below the form above it would not be able to exist. I think this is the modus compendium for how our reality operates on the smallest and largest scales. I think this is a design you will find signs of everywhere you dare to see it in this reality, but it also means there is a bottom and a ceiling, which I think is not something the “real” world is like outside this matrix.
To keep every form performing its role in a system so that the form above it can continue to exist the way it does I think is done through presenting each form with dangers that threaten their existence in their form, motivating them through a selection process to remain to work together in that system with other alike forms. That system itself is the form above them, and that form is subject to the same mechanics. This goes on and on, meaning our form as physical beings is a form that together with all other physical beings spawns the next form, just like our cells spawn us. We are an emergent form from the forms below us, as goes for each level. Between each form is a transition to the form above. But we are conscious beings. Though truly complex, I don’t think our cells are particularly conscious, and neither do I think any of the molecules, atoms, or any of the subatomic particles, and what ever levels below I don’t know about are for that matter. But we are.
We’re physical beings, but by far are not all physical beings on this planet conscious choice makers. The bulk of biomass on Earth consists out of unconscious lifeforms. Though they do make choices. But how does a bacterium choose to move away from the heat? How does a fungal spore choose to grow towards a food source? How does a plant seed know when to germinate? In most cases, the choices that result in the longevity of the life form are made through sensory stimuli. It’s a chemical reaction. How then does a more complex yet not particularly conscious animal make its choices? Take a grasshopper, a frog, or a jellyfish? I’ll attribute their choices to instinct. Instinct uses sensory input but there is someone at the helm here. Not all choices they make are logical. They are more complex, and more prone to variation. Though perhaps I should be careful not to dismiss the possibility of our simpler brethren being able of acting outside of their design too quickly. They might already inhibit this trade, though I wouldn’t call their choices purely chemical.
But beings that might not be particularly conscious still are able to venture from their design in their choice making. There’s something more to it than just instinct. And now that I think of it, quantum particles are particularly unpredictable, but apologies for throwing you off my own train of thought. Climb back on please. We’re getting to a group of beings where there’s more going on than just simple instinct. I’ve seen some truly complex behaviours from “simple” life forms and the behaviour of many mammals is surprisingly aware. There surely are many levels of consciousness, and mammals are represented on the whole spectrum, us humans most likely sitting at the far end. We’re not alone on the spectrum though, but let’s see where these thoughts take us as is. Somewhere on that spectrum we become conscious choice makers, meaning the being will be aware of future consequences of certain choices. Its choices are influenced by an insight that is not of this time, but by something that exists in a future that hasn’t arrived yet.
Instinct still drives us, but that’s not all that’s influencing us. We can go against our design by choice, which is something I don’t see a plant or bacterium capable of. Though we are all physical beings, there is a gradual change into something new. I think in a way this is a transition into a new form, where the form above controls the form below. With the arrogance of a modern scientist I declared that we – humans – sit on the far end of the scale, but it’s an assumption that actually has no place in this work. It is not difficult to try and imagine that scale being a lot bigger, with a form of consciousness that is not subject to sensory stimuli or instinct. For all we know we’re sitting at the bottom of the consciousness scale as we have no means to truly measure consciousness. Who’s to say what’s true about our place in this world? But one thing persists in this reality and that is that each form is subject to a selection process that selects based on what system each form is part of, and when it comes to life forms that selection process involves dangers to the existence of the life form, persuading it to make choices that keeps its form in tact and out of harm’s way.
This is where duality is a key factor. Everything in our reality has a counterpart. The proton has the anti-proton, for example. And do you know what happens when they meet? They annihilate each other, and the energy that they consist of is released in an instant. Isn’t that interesting? When matter meets antimatter, the whole mass basically explodes. Now I am unsure of how the meeting of the counterparts goes on each level, but I do think that on our plane this duality is found in the dynamic between good and evil, and I think they represent fundamental sides to the total process that keeps this reality in tact. But we can change sides. And quantum particles can change their type too, though I do not know whether they can change to their counterparts. If my thesis is correct, they should be able to. Our current form isn’t the end form, and we can choose which side of the duality we wish to be a part of. There is a form above us that emerges out of the systems of its forms below. I think the mechanism in place that facilitates the transition between good and evil on our plane involves our use of technology. We will either flock towards it mindlessly or use it with great care and consideration. That is the choice we are presented in our lifetime in our current form.
Those that reject it will create the form our religions tell us is the side of good, where those that embrace technology create the counter-form to that, which I would call the side of evil. When these two opposites meet, I also think the meeting will be explosive and annihilates those parts that meet, just as with matter and antimatter. Therefore there is an incentive for both sides to want to avoid this meeting, or at least be smart about what they sacrifice should they want to remain existing in their current form of stacked dependencies. Both sides need to have dangers that motivate them to want to remain in their current form, otherwise they would’ve let go of their form already. And this realisation gave me an interesting insight into the life of a technologically advanced alien, from Earth or somewhere else. As our own technological development continues, one thing stands out to me, which is that the speed of information gathering and consumption in my world increases exponentially. The hunger to collect, store, and process data is growing and it pushes our technological stride to find better ways to facilitate this process.
I can easily see how in the future those that have embraced technology will cybernetically enhance themselves to be able to view and remember more and more data in a shorter time. Remember then that our media is one of the methods the higher form uses to keep us doing what we’re doing by presenting us with foes through our data stream. “Climate change, global hackers, paedophiles, warring nations, alien invaders…” Imagine then what foes this process must erect for a race of beings that have technological capabilities so strong that it puts us on par with stone age hominids in comparison to them? What powers do powerful beings have to be told about to keep performing their role to serve the form above them? Their information stream must foretell of the existence of existential threats beyond their capabilities from which they’d want to be kept safe. The more this process continues the bigger the threats must become, much like we see in our own news media. There is a madness to this world, and it is apparent in the selection process of what news propagates best. Through fear the lower parts of the pyramid are kept in check. Therefore I don’t expect the threats to become less threatening the more our technological abilities and thus our power of influence increases. In fact, the opposite must be true.
As our power grows, so grows the need for the system to scare us with a bigger foe. But let’s paddle back then to how all these forms relate to our spirits. I’ve written that our spirits – or sparks – are the core essence of us, but I do not think they are physical. They are the part of us outside this reality. All these forms – from the subatomic to us, and all the way to whatever sits on top of the pyramid – are vessels that spirits can embody. Currently we embody the vessel of a human being. Our souls facilitate the connection between our spark and this reality, which includes the vessel. It is from the soul the power of the spark is harvested for every form that exists. Now, I’ve written extensively in the Scrolls about the swindles that keep us here in this reality, one of which being that we can be given the choice at another life in this reality, and through our experiences we might be compelled to get in on another experience. Maybe we want to avoid the mistakes we’ve made in this new life, or maybe we have become aware of some truths and wish to enter the timeline to try and make a difference against evil. Or maybe we embrace corruption and choose that side. Or perhaps we desire to see the future of our previous life. Or maybe, just maybe, we desire a simpler life.
There is so much to choose from, just from our time on Earth. There’s our current civilisation, but also many past ones, and perhaps also future ones. You can pop in at any life at any time. You can go into the future and choose a life after the fall, or back in time in the middle stages of a technological super power. There’s truly so much to choose from. Who knows, maybe we eventually choose and live them all? It’d make sense to me. But one thing you cannot choose; you cannot choose the direction that time flows towards once you reincarnate. You can choose a vessel where in time you spawn into, but once chosen, time flows in the same direction it always flowed in. And that got me thinking. I once wrote on this website that I thought time was one of the few glimpses of God we could get, but I think I was wrong. I don’t think this is correct. God isn’t time. I think time might be the one force behind this universe that desires to be God. A force that forces everything to move in a certain direction, obeying certain laws. But it’s part of the swindle of dependency-driven existence. The real God is timeless.
Let me explain that a little bit more. Your choice for your point of entry depends on your spiritual growth. Will you indulge yourself in pleasures and comfort, or choose a path of challenge and hardship? Or maybe you don’t want to get involved? The higher the vibration of your soul – and thus the bigger your soul is – the better you will find a focus on what you need to grow even wiser. I think the wiser you are, the less complicated you’d want things to be. You’ve learned enough from all your endeavours. A wise soul isn’t looking for a way to win the battle, but will instead opt to increase their vibration and observe. But since time moves forward into one direction only, and technological stride walks the arrow of time, the evil in this matrix is able to syphon off spiritual energy from even those that wish to go back to simpler times. Every side feeds the system, until you get to particles that experience no time. I once wrote in this work that for Angels time slows down until it almost stops. They need no time to heal. I also wrote that Angels are the wisdoms of God’s will.
Know then that photons (another fundamental particle) – which travel at the speed of light – experience no passage of time. None at all. If you look at a specific star in your night sky, and that star is 10 light years away, it means that this light has been traveling for 10 years at light speed before it got observed by you. What you observe are photons that traveled all that way to hit your retina. But even though from our point of view this journey took them 10 years, from the point of view of the photons themselves the journey was instantaneous. If you want to know how we know, you’ll have to familiarise yourself with Einstein’s theory of relativity. There are some excellent documentaries free to access on the internet that do a good job explaining it in an understandable way. Putting this in context to this work, it means that when certain conditions are met, time will stand still. Interesting then that I and others associate the light with the side of good, and darkness as something evil. And interesting also that when you look out at the night sky, much of it is dark. Our light is locally strong in our solar system, but this universe looks much like our night sky everywhere.
Now lets get more fringe than you might be used to from me. Traveling at the speed of light results in you not experiencing any time. That is the condition you need to be in. Another way for you to not experience time is to move into a gravitational field that is infinitely strong, meaning going beyond the event horizon of a black hole. If certain conditions are met that make time grind to a halt, that means it must be possible to free ourselves from time. But the ways I mention prior both involve conditions. And if you wish to experience timelessness in this vessel than I am sorry to say but that is impossible. When time stands still for you, either because you somehow found a way to move at the speed of light, or fell into a black hole, or by some other means I do not know about, it means your clock stops, but the clock of the rest of the universe won’t. You’ll be bathed in the radiation of all photons that would ever hit you at your locations over the whole of time. This is one of the conundrums physicists discuss when talking about hypothetical future endeavours that involve traveling at light speed.
It basically means you’d not survive. But maybe that’s the point of it? We cannot cheat our way to become God, obviously. But still it means it is possible, just not as this vessel. What if I imagined a vessel without any dependencies? Could a thought be a vessel? Well, a thought requires a thinker. That’s a condition, so still not what we’re looking for. What about truth? I wrote that knowledge leads to objective truths that are only true in this reality, but wisdoms lead to fundamental truths that are true in any reality, not just this one. Can a wisdom be a vessel? I think so. I once wrote that Angels are manifestations of wisdom. In the context of this appendix this makes even more sense. A truth doesn’t require anyone to believe it to be true. A truth is something that depends on nothing to be true. But that only goes for fundamental truths, of course. The objective truths in this reality are only true here. It confirms objective truths are the evil counterfeit to the fundamental truths of good. And if objective truths are only true in this reality, then that is their dependency, confirming once more the mechanics behind evil, existing through dependencies.
Imagine then that the spirits that once died as humans chose to side with the dualistic side of the army of good in this world, thinking they’d support the real God, are spirits that in essence vowed to embody an objective truth. They are angels, but only in this reality. But should a spirit choose to embody a fundamental truth, that spirit will become truly timeless, just like a true Angel of the Lord. An Angel of the Truth. But I don’t think we are ready for that choice just yet. I think we’re all spiritual younglings. Whenever I converse with the beyond that guides me, I kinda feel like a pet dog. I don’t mean to say I think they see or treat me as a pet, but the dynamic between us is comparable. I cannot truly converse with them, but can only opt to observe and play along, just like a pet dog. A dog can’t say its name, but it does know its name when he hears it. I think in a similar way I and others are spiritually able to understand what the beings that embody wisdom convey to us. We can’t speak it, but we can hear it.
When I visit the spiritual realm when in the twilight between sleep and awake, I find I am most often very much inclined to view that world from my human perspective, subjecting my experiences to a view of dualism. I constantly expect either a friend or a foe. I therefore can assume that when I die, and I find myself confronted with a choice of how to continue, I am likely to opt for an existence of dependency, not being able to see outside the matrix just yet. And that isn’t shameful or sad; this reality truly is a complicated spiritual ecosystem. I don’t think most of us are spiritually mature enough to realise the full palette of choices we have for the great choice ever after, and I think we just gradually gravitate towards what we find most fitting, and that is possibly subject to dark manipulation for the weaker spirits. But surely there’s also guidance for the higher spirits. The entities I spoke about in the previous appendix probably also have their counterparts; beings that live by eliciting positive emotions in us from which they feed themselves. Though a life of dependency, is that really all that evil? Is someone who wants to fight in the army of the light to slay demons an evil person? There’s a gradient of levels of both evil and good in the dualistic properties of this reality, that each have a severity to them. And although both sides play their part in keeping this matrix in tact, there are differences in motivation, and there is true good even in dualistic good.
So eventually we become God, by going through the experience of all there is to experience. But then this got me thinking. Isn’t that a condition then? If we can only appreciate Heaven by going through hell, if we can only understand every being and let them be by living through each and everyone of their lives, is that then not a sign of evil through its implied dependency? Surely there should be no conditions to the existence of a deity that is the ultimate good. What are we missing? That would be the arrow of time. I think God is free of time, and our way to him is finding a way to travel backwards in time. Think about how our lives would unfold if the end was the beginning. Our bodies would not decay in the ground, but worms and bacteria would excrete this body, that would eventually begin to move and live a life. Instead of living from other beings it would create other beings. It would produce an apple from its mouth, go out to the field and hang the apple on a branch of a tree. In reverse, everything we do is the opposite of what we do when we play our live’s events in the determined direction. Maybe time as we experience it is flowing backwards, and reverse is the actual key to the divination of God. The light at the end of the tunnel is perhaps the event of the big bang.
The big bang might be that mirror surface I spoke about in the Scrolls. The flip side where evil and good are truly distinguished. Maybe if we go back far enough in our timeline, we can punch through that event into the other side. But to get there we need to choose a spiritual path that leads back to where we came from. We need to reverse time. When time reverses, we become creators. The way we all came into existence is through the creation of ourselves. We are God. Wanting to go through all this pain was the path of most resistance. God is our future self talking back to us about his struggles.
I think that I broke my own rules through this Appendix. When I started out I did not want to expand on my work of the Scrolls. Yet, with this Appendix I think I did that. Though I do understand why I did not publish these notes in the Scrolls. At the time I did not fully understand where the notes took me. Having read back the Scrolls a few times myself while I was writing this Appendix brought the direction of these notes into focus. In the end the Appendices are meant to better understand my work and I think this Appendix will fulfil this purpose well. It makes me wonder how many other revelations are hidden away in old notes and in the Scrolls. It wouldn’t surprise me if there are things in there I hadn’t connected yet.
~reckneya
