Date: 14-09-2020
Last night my dad came to visit me, and I became lucid.
I dreamt D and I were on the run from the authorities for some reason. We lived a bit like John Connor and his mother Sarah, from the Terminator TV series. We were constantly on the run. Our crime was that we had unveiled what my dad’s last wishes truly were. At the moment we were living in an old abandoned office building that was on the calendar to be demolished. The building had already been completely stripped down by workers and the only thing still standing of it was the hard concrete structure.
The government had sent two specific women after us. They were a kind of detective operatives; very neatly dressed. From our shelters we had often seen them visit places we had been prior, so we knew they were always on our trail, though always a few steps behind. So D and I were going back to this office building we called home, but dived into the bushes as we neared the building as we saw those two women browse the parking space in front of that building. “Shit! They found us.”
But after a few minutes they both left again. Maybe they had found our stuff but thought it belonged to homeless people who had moved into the building? It was unclear. It was safe for us to come out. D had to go take the car somewhere. Maybe she was going to dump it, to cover our tracks, or maybe she needed to run an errand. Also, unclear. But I had gotten really tired in the dream, so she would do this alone. I would go in and take a nap on our improvised bed inside the structure. As I got in and had ascended to our floor, I laid down on the mattress on my right shoulder, and took a nap.
In this nap I had a dream. Yes, a dream within a dream. I dreamt I was part of a group of entities with superpowers. They had accepted me into their ranks, together also with another human; a young guy in his early 20s. In this dream I was now in a phase of my life where I had discovered my powers, and in this group I was going to explore and train those powers. But the leader of the group was really a bastard, and he constantly bullied the younger guy, who was the weakest of the group. I couldn’t allow it. It was too unfair. Though I was not as strong as this leader, I did not fear him.
So, I performed some kind of ritual to this younger guy, through which I took an oath to protect him. I did that right in front of our group leader so he would see it. And he got angry at me, and then wanted to test me to see if I would keep true to my word. And I did. I fought him like I fought any demon from the dream world, and pushed him to the ground with my left arm. I’m not sure how this fight ended. He might’ve yielded, or at least stopped his bullying, but I am unsure. I vaguely remembered there were other things, but it was all too incoherent to write down. But I woke up out of that dream slowly into the dream layer above it.
Someone was softly rocking me on my left shoulder, while whispering my name. “Willem… Willem…” I was still so tired, and remained in that twilight moment, as they kept trying to wake me. I thought it was D, and thought maybe she had gotten back already, and now wanted us to relocate again to get the operatives off our scent. I was facing away, so I brought my right hand up and laid it on the hand which was still softly rocking my shoulder. The voice whispered: “Willem, I have to go… I have to go.” Have to go? Wait, she wasn’t gone yet? Oh well.
I softly half asleep mumbled my acknowledgement, gripping the hand which gripped me back. But then I realised this hand I was holding was not her hand. It was too big. It was a strong hand. I suddenly realised it was my dad’s voice whispering, and this was his hand. It felt like the same hand I had held when I had come to say goodbye to him in the waking world. As the dream became lucid, I also felt I was waking up. The hand let go as he walked away, and I tried to grab his hand again, turning onto my back, and reaching out for him.
But as I did I started to leave the dream realm. I saw a figure in the dream world walk away from my bed, woke up in my own bed, having turned on my back with my right hand stretched out into the air. And for a split second I still saw that dark figure in this realm, walking away from me, moving through the wall. It was a dark silhouette. I think it was my dad’s soul. It was only a fraction of a second, but I am sure I saw it.
I think this was the Earthly soul of my dad, coming to say goodbye to me one last time as he was moving into his next spiritual chapter. Man, I wish I had woken up in that dream, but I was just too tired and didn’t want to get up. I realised too late what was going on. It sure would’ve been nice to see him one last time. The idea he visited me to say goodbye one last time brings me to tears.
